Subhekshya's blog

I had the biggest revelation of my life last week. I was a part of a dance performance during an event at the office offsite.   I was happy and doing great till the time someone came to me and showed me the video of my performance. It was a disaster!! I don’t know why I was jumping all over the place; the theme was definitely not ‘monkey dance’. Yes, after all these years (no quoting!), I got to know that ‘I can’t dance’!!!! Dance is one of the things which I absolutely adore.   I might have inherited this liking from my mother, coz she loves to dance. Sometimes, after a midnight party (having danced for 5 hours straight); we come home and dance coz we can’t get enough. My startling revelation on dance made me hopeless. So, I did some research on dance. The more I read about it, the more inspired I became.   I don’t think I can ever give up dancing coz it’s one of the thing that makes me happy and helps me keep going. (@Ashok Bhandari, I will be needing ur help for this!!).

Statutory Warning: This blog deals with sensitive subject matter. Not recommended to people who are already contemplating their ‘non-single’ status. (We don’t want u to be depressed) Situation:  Your partner is coming to see you Non-single: I need to take a shower/ wax/ shave/change clothes, bed-sheets and every visible thing/ be presentable/ hide personal belongings/ delete messages and call logs/ erase history from the system/ sign out from my mail account/ put the baywatch poster aside and hang his/her picture etc..etc...etc...    Single: This situation is hypothetical!! I am good!!! Situation:  It’s 11 pm Non-single: OMG, it’s already 11 and I haven’t even called her!!! I will just call coz I love my life and don’t wanna die!!  (This activity is mandatory and has to last till the very last second the individual falls asleep) Single: Oh, it’s 11…. I will talk to someone (whom I actually like)/ read/ watch TV/ sleep/ blog/ do my manicure/ stalk some

I was on a client meet the other day. There I met a guy, from Biratnagar, who worked at the office that I visited. During the meet, the ED called him to his cabin and addressed him as “Bahadur”. Should I have been offended by it?? When I thought about it, I was not. The ED was addressing my fellow Nepali by a respectful name- “Bahadur”. It means brave/ courageous in Nepali language. Rather than calling someone who works in a pantry as “Abe” , he chose a name; a proper one!! Should I see any wrong in that?? Time to introspect now; what about us calling people “Dhoti”?? What does that word even mean?? Aren’t we ourselves judgemental on the basis of nationality?? Isn’t calling someone “Dhoti” offensive?? No one can beat us, on being overly sensitive coz our “pride” is like an open wound. It gets infected; too fast too easy. Some hot chick in a TV serial makes a random statement about “Buddha being born in India”; and what do we do?? Start a big demonstration in the streets; send

   If you follow ‘How I met your Mother’ like I do, you might be very well versed with the term ‘bro-code’. But, what about 'Girl's code'??  The more I thought about it, the more I was convinced that we do have codes (Trust me, they are nothing less than amazing!!) . I have tried to include these codes in the blog. Hope, you will have a good time reading it :)       Friendship before appearance.. Although, we might have completely hated the brown and black frill dress that our Gff wore during the weekend night out, we can never be blunt and say something like “You look disastrous”. We tend to un- notice small details to save something big like friendship!!   Gff and not boys!! Your friend is in a relationship and she introduces you to her guy. Your thought process goes something like ‘OMG…how did she find a guy like him?? He is hot!! I hope he has some good looking friends’. She calls you in the evening and asks you ‘So, how did you like my boy?’ You

‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times …’ What an amazing opening of the book 'Tale of two cities' by Charles Dickens . Can good and bad exist at the same time? How can something be the most beautiful yet really ugly? Something which you hate but still love (truly, madly, deeply)...Something so wrong yet so right... Something so close yet 1000 miles apart... Something so serene yet so turbulent... May be, some questions are supposed to be unanswered. Reality is far different than perception. The fact about existence of millions colours cannot be falsified just because the same is not visible to the human eyes. What we see is just a small fragment of our imagination. The setting of the sun can be seen as fallen hopes and a dying day but can also be visualised as a beginning of something completely new. What is considered as wrong might in fact be the best thing that can ever happen to us. What one could have perceived as endless pain, suffering and misery was

When I was small, I remember my sister saying that her dream was to own an island. I would be delighted to hear this coz it meant a lot of family outings (that too in a fab place, who wouldn't want that!!). My mother would say that one should not be overly ambitious coz it ultimately leads to unhappiness (when unfulfilled). At that time, I never knew whose side to take - my sister (with an awesome dream) or my mom (with her genuine concerns).     A dream is like a spark, an ignition coz that is what it takes to get your life started. I recently met a friend. When he shared his dream, I was awestruck; he wanted to own a personal jet. I laughed at it and asked how he intended to do that. Trust me, he had his life planned out (short term/ long term goals and so on) and I ended up saying ‘Forget that I ever laughed at your dreams, coz I would love to travel in your jet someday’. I t takes a lot of passion and courage to say something like ‘I dream of changing the world’ or ‘I drea

This blog is dedicated to all the readers who are considering “ARRANGED” marriage as an option. I had no clue what the whole process was about until recently where I got some insights from a really close friend whom I am really thankful to J . I don’t know how many of us are aware of this, but the process of arranged marriage starts with the basics- ‘The Resume’. The prospective bride/ groom prepares their respective resume, which includes details like name, age, occupation, hobby and other additional details like name and designation of one’s grandfather and even chacha-chaci (who knows, u might be related to Dawood). It also includes some personal sensitive info like your Salary and your ‘Manglik’ status. The same is then mass circulated to the intended user.   One of my friends got a powerpoint resume from a prospective guy.   As soon as she opened the ppt, there was a thunderstorm and then appeared his name. Then, another thunderstorm and his age. The thunderstorm contin

Let me share with you a very interesting piece of information. Professor Simon Critchley from New York City's New School offers classes on writing suicide note to students as part of a month long series of performances, installations and lectures called the school of death. He believes that; the only way to really learn how to live is to prepare to die. He said that if people were more comfortable talking about death, there might be a fewer suicides. He initiates discussion on the topic by reading out the suicide notes of some of the notable personalities- from Kurt Kobain to Adolf Hitler.  I did some basic research on how, why and what of suicide.  I was amazed to discover the single most important fact- Just as any other normal disease, suicide is preventive .  According to Dr. Alex Lickerman, one of the reasons of people attempting suicide is because they're crying out for help and don't know how else to get it. He says “These people don

When I look back at my life, there’s not a single moment that I would change. I don’t wanna jinx it by saying, but I am in love with my life.  Did I have a fairy tale story? –No. Was my life perfect?? -Indeed not. Like everyone else, I had my share of pain. I failed a number of times.  I failed to get through the medical college although my only persistent dream since childhood was to be a paediatrician (Short term dreams included marrying a Spanish Guy, being the next Jodie Foster after watching Silence of the lambs or being adopted by Bill and Melinda) To see my only dream get shattered was like being judged and told that ‘You are not good enough’.  It echoed in my ears for so long that sometimes it was hard to hear anything else.  I failed in my CA finals too (However, it’s worth mentioning that there’s a saying- If Jesus has never failed; he must try CA). I have failed in numerous assignments at work.  I have failed to meet the expectations of many people. There were times when

I don’t know what my school mates call me at school. I bet it must be something like – ‘lady hulk’ or ‘the ugly duckling’. The only time a last bencher guy talked to me was when he needed info about some good looking girl in my class. I am just 15 but I feel like a complete disaster.  I am always having a bad hair day; I don’t have a perfect set of teeth and my mother tells me time and again that the only thing I am good at, is my study and if I give up the only thing I am good at, I will end up nowhere because I am neither good at work nor am I as pretty as the other girls my age. I am not 60yrs, however my parents and teachers tell me all the time to cut down on the food that I eat.  To tell you the truth, I love to eat. I love chocolates and ice creams. I love doughnuts and pizza and I am always ready for a mid-night snack. Yes, I am a bit chubby and that’s the reason why my school mates call me by some lame names like lady hulk. It’s not that hulk is lame, coz I love him. 

One of my colleagues broke up with her long time boyfriend. She said that her boyfriend was relocated to some Middle East country and had no intentions to return any time soon.  So, they decided that they would break up instead of waiting for their relationship to fall apart and destroying every good memory they had when they were actually in love.  When I asked her whether she was heartbroken, she replied ‘I am, but it’s for a better good’. There are so many couples, both married and unmarried who are in a long distance relationship, as long as 10 years or even more. All they long is a better tomorrow.  They live their life expecting a better future for themselves or their children.  And there are people like my colleague who believes in ‘living in the moment’. Does long distance relationship actually work?? As I pondered deep, I was clueless.  Being in a long distance relationship is not easy.  It’s actually terrible coz you want someone to hold your hand when you are fa

I always believed in happy endings. It was fate that I met a girl like you.  I still remember the first time I saw you. May be it was love at first sight coz you mesmerised me.  I was so desperate to get your name and number coz I was scared that I could never see you again. But as fate would have it, you not only gave your number but your personal details starting from educational background to marital status (by handing me your resume for the job that we advertised). It was our destiny that you were appointed for the vacant post. I won’t deny that I was the one who insisted my boss on recruiting you (for which I could have added one or more qualifications than stated in your resume). I still remember the first date that we went, you and me, to a dinner in this fabulous place (P.S. with hundred of our office colleagues in an office retreat).  How can I forget the way you beautifully moved along with the song that was being played? I don’t know what was more beautiful, you or t

I was passing by the Arrow outlet in Indiranagar when I caught the glimpse of the most beautiful thing I have seen since a long time and I instantly fell in love with it. It was a white and a black dress and I knew I had to have it.  I took it to the changing room and as soon as I put it on, I was possessed. It was a feeling that something has taken a hold on me and compelling me to hand over my credit card to the gentleman, that too with a feeling of having won a lottery.    Like exercise is to body and reading to mind, shopping is to heart (especially to women). In the words of Erma Bombeck, “Shopping is a woman thing. It's a sport like football. Women enjoy the scrimmage, the noisy crowds, the danger of being trampled to death, and the ecstasy of the purchase.” If people think that ‘women are too materialistic and indulge in shopping’, I request them to rephrase the statement cause shopping is truly an emotional thing. Shopping is about attachment- we are instantly att

Ladies, every one of us might have had the feeling when we adore certain things in life knowing that we will never be able to have it.  Let’s say, like the hot geography teacher in school who is way out of your league or the million dollar diamond ring that you always wanted to be proposed with (for which you need to marry someone like Jay-Z) or The Mouawad’s 1001 nights purse that makes your heart skip a beat whenever you see it.  Yes, there are things that we simply love but are just out of reach. We accept the hard reality of life and move on.  We compromise and settle down. But now, there’s something new to worry about –‘The guys’!!!  If you just go to Thamel or Pokhara or any happening places in the town, you will be heart broken by the fact that the number of good guys you see is almost NIL. By good guys, I am referring to guys who are ridiculously good looking, irresistibly charming, and in the scale of 8 or more.  P.S. I am not at all talking about people with inner be

As a kid, we used to play dead.  We used to lay flat on our backs, legs and hands wide spread, tilt the head a little and stick our tongue out.  Whenever someone would come near us, we would stop our breath and pretend that we just died.  Believe me, children my age actually believed the prank. How I miss those days!! ’One of the luckiest things that can happen to you is, to have a happy childhood’ says Agatha Christie which is in fact very true. I consider children born in the 80’s to be the luckiest (M not just saying it because I was born in the same decade).  The 80’s was the time when we had TV in our houses. NTV, the first channel broadcasted in Nepal started operation in 1984.  How can we forget the VCR and the Tapes??? The 80’s was also the time of the personal computers- IBM PC to Apple Macintosh. The first 3D video game was invented in the 80’s and so was the digital cellular phone.  I remember my brother’s friend bringing an ‘ATARI’ (a video game) in our home.  I

‘So, where do you see yourself after five years?’ the interviewer asked.  Man, I can’t predict where m gonna be this Sunday and you ask me to predict my future after five years?? I am an accountant not a fortune teller.  I hope your next question won’t be something like ‘How many years do you think you gonna live?’ If that is what you intend to ask, I will backfire at you and reply ‘I don’t know about myself, but you are surely gonna die right now!!’  Interviews are pretty tough.  You have to be well dressed and be at your best to meet a complete stranger (you don’t even know whether they are of the opposite sex) who is gonna ask you some rapid fire questions (for which they don’t even give you some lifeline) and the worst part is that you can’t even say that you’re done.  The other day, I went to this renowned company.  The interviewer asked me to tell me about myself and I did.  He wanted to know about my family, I replied.  Then the interview started being much more personal. H

When you are employed, the only thing that comes to mind is ‘Gosh, I am tired of the job. If only m able to quit the job, I will be happily unemployed’. Once you actually quit, you get into a panic attack ‘OMG, I left my job, I don’t know what m I gonna do wid my life now, if only I could get a new job’.   Yes my friend, this is life and it happens to all of us.  The grass is always gonna be greener on the other side.  Must have happened to spiderman too when he was cursing his powers of a superhero (for ruining his only chance to get back to his girlfriend) and actually loses all his powers in the second part of the movie.  We work and curse our life when we are employed. The hefty salary that we get at the end of the month is no substitute to all the pressures we face during the month. So, if given a chance, what do you wanna do if you don’t have to go to your office everyday and have all the time on earth?? Go on a road trip, travel around the world, go skydiving or do any

The other day, I invited some of my girlfriends for a night stay. As all young girls, all we did was talk, that too for hours. We talked about our job (which was all about a new hot girl in office and the threat that followed), life (that it sucked), food (about a new mobile app for calculating calories in foods), music and movies (who wore the worst dress at the oscars) and guys (which was about 90% of what we talked). After a few glasses of beer, we started talking about a vague topic - ‘love’. We struggled to get into a conclusion what love actually is.  After midnight, we finally agreed that ‘ love is something, the feeling of which is unexplainable and the lovers clueless '. As a 16 year old girl, love for me was a romantic flick like ‘You’ve got mail’ or ‘Preety Woman’ where two perfect individual meet, have their differences in the beginning which they sort out and eventually lead a perfect happy life. But now, I feel of having I lapse of judgment then. All these ro

 Life's a riddle. When we complete sorting out the troubles in life, we are struck with other new problems. On the other hand, when we lose hope and are ready to give up, life shows new opportunities and new hopes. It surely acts in a mysterious way. I happen to remember a quote from one of my favourite movies -The forrest Gump,'life's like a box of chocolates,you never know what you're gonna get', which is infact very true. May be this is what makes life worth living,worth fighting and worth surviving.        So, it's a mere waste of time if you are crying over life for not being as planned. Remember, Life has not promised to be any different than what it is now. May be its simply about living each day, each hour and each moment. So, what the hell!!  Make mistakes, laugh at it, life's not fair, accept it, fall down, rise again, face the fearful, fall in love, stand for yourself, be stupid, dance in the rain, make a fool out of yourself, cry your h